The Joy Of Oneness

~Nancy Goring

I have noticed lately that there are many young folks who are engaged, anticipating marriage in the near future. That is a great thing. Marriage is beautiful, and has been instituted by Jehovah God. He knew that man would need a helpmeet; someone to share his life with, so God created woman from the rib of man and the two became one. Genesis 2:23 and Matthew 19:5 are passages that God gives us for the basis for our marriages. When we marry, we are to join ourselves to that one we have chosen and leave parents and cleave to one another. “For this cause shall a man leave father and mother and shall cleave to his wife and the twain shall become one flesh.” (Matthew 19:5). This is such a beautiful passage as it shows the oneness of marriage. “In Genesis 2:24 the Hebrew words are l­baasaar °echaad. Our Lord literally translates Matthew 19:5 to mean also, that children, compounded as it were of both, should be the product of the matrimonial connection. Thus, they two (man and woman) shall be for the producing of one flesh, the very same kind of human creature with themselves.” (from Adam Clarke's Commentary, Electronic Database. Copyright © 1996, 2003, 2005, 2006 by Biblesoft, Inc. All rights reserved.) (from Adam Clarke's Commentary, Electronic Database. Copyright © 1996, 2003, 2005, 2006 by Biblesoft, Inc. All rights reserved.) Note that marriage is between a man and woman and children are produced from this union. Same sex marriages have never been designed nor accepted by God. The very anatomical nature of the male and female would logically dictate this.

 

Marriage can be the biggest blessing in our lives, second only to our Christianity. Sadly, many enter into marriage blindly, or basing their decision upon the physical needs being met, and often ignorantly. I do not say that to be demeaning, but I fear that there is not nearly enough teaching on this grave subject today. Above and beyond the fact that the world has twisted the meaning of “marriage” to incorporate same sex unions, Hollywood, magazines, TV and movies have given us a distorted view of marriage. They would have us to believe that we “deserve” so much, that it is okay to be self-serving, self-centered and selfish, and that our mate is to provide our every little whim. In fact, marriage is a job. Yes, I know that sounds a bit harsh but you must work at it. It doesn’t just “happen!” When the “two” become “one,” as God intended, they will put the other’s needs first. They will strive to be as kind and loving as possible to one another, because that is how they want to be treated. Ephesians 5:22-25 gives us a beautiful picture of the marriage relationship. It is selfless. It is compared to that precious relationship that Christ has with His bride, the church.That is what real love is. There is much joy in the oneness of marriage. For our marriages to be great, we must learn to be one, not two. As we meld together in body, mind and spirit, we take on an entire new entity, producing that oneness God spoke of. That is the way He designed us. Only when we practice this oneness will we be complete. We need to teach our young people this and share those Bible verses that will allow them to know how to cultivate that beautiful union that God expects of us. The following words were spoken by Tertullian a long time ago. 

 

“Beautiful the marriage of Christians; two who are one in hope, one in desire, one in the way of life they follow, one in the religion they practice.

They are both servants of the same Master. Nothing divides them, either in flesh or in spirit.

They are two in one flesh, and where there is one flesh, there is also one spirit.

They pray together, they worship together; instructing one another, strengthening one another.

Side by side they visit God's church; side by side, they face difficulties and persecution, share their consolations.

They have no secrets from one another, they never bring sorrow to one another’s hearts.

Unembarrassed they visit the sick and assist the needy. They give alms without anxiety.

Psalms and hymns they sing. Hearing and seeing this, Christ rejoices. To such as these He gives His peace.” Tertullian of Charthage 160 - 230 A. D. 

 

Notice the last phrase, “to such as these He gives His peace.” When we function in our marriages as God designed us, following His will in all things, we will be blessed with peaceful godly marriages. After almost 49 years  I am still working at my marriage – that I might be the best that I can be,  pleasing in the sight of God. I pray that each of you will do the same and reap the Joy Of Oneness.

Nancy is the wife of Bill Goring, who serves as a gospel preacher and elder for the Chipman Road church of Christ in Lee’s Summit, Missouri. She has 4 children, 11 grandchildren and has taught Bible class for over 40 years, speaks at Ladies Day gatherings and has published several books including: Behavior Becoming Holiness: Studies in Titus Chapter 2 and Overcoming our Self-Imposed Prisons.